Stop the Insanity!

img_1541I don’t know how many of you saw the photos of Lil Kim’s most recent change in appearance but when I saw them, my heart broke into a thousand pieces. I mean I literally and figuratively cringed. What is wrong with people? Why do we go to such extremes to feel we have achieved beauty?

I can understand changing hairstyles, make-up, clothing styles and even weight loss to achieve a new look; a new update. But to change skin color for improvement is so wrong and so vile to me. The message that supports this change is one of non acceptance of one’s self. It is tampering with the very core of who we are and sending the message “As I am, I am not good enough”. “I need to look whiter” to feel good; to feel beautiful”.

I absolutely hate the message that is being sent with her new look. It is an insult to me as a black woman.
Now I know many may disagree with me, and that is certainly o.k, but when are we going to stop equating lightness of skin color to achieving a warped level of beauty? What is she thinking? In 2016, this should not even be a part of our mental make-up. We should not even be having this conversation.

Society has already done a number on us, historically with this whole light-skinned vs. dark-skinned mess. It has hurt us; rewarded us, inappropriately; and has pitted us against one another for far too long. Believe me when I say “I know first hand”. The crap, within families, on how we treat each other based on skin color is ridiculous. I have seen it and I have lived it. The way society has rewarded those who are light skinned makes me ill and resentful of the ones who perpetuate it.

I have hated how we view each other. I have hated how we treat each other and have turned on each other and I have hated how we have allowed society to dictate to us what their standard of beauty is.

I want us to stop this mess. I want us to love ourselves. I want us to send a message to the world that we are beautiful and comfortable in our own skin not matter what the hue, no matter what the shade and that we love ourselves enough to embrace it, to flaunt it and to bare it proudly without bleaching and without chemically changing it. Put on the make-up. Go for the glamour. But for goodness sake! Leave your color alone!


  1. I know where you’re coming from & understand the pain this sort of thing causes you, Pam. I shook my head at first when I saw this too. But then I started thinking – isn’t there a larger issue here? How many white people spend tons of money & risk melanoma to be tan? How many spend thousands and thousands of dollars on cosmetic surgery to have a smaller nose, higher cheekbones, or look younger? How many spend thousands on “body art”? It’s totally repugnant if the point is to impress someone else. But if, for whatever reason, they feel more aesthetic pleasure when they look in the mirror, isn’t it really a personal choice that should be respected? I don’t understand it, but I’m not seeing what they see in the mirror. Maybe we shouldn’t judge their choices based on our viewpoint? Your thoughts?


    • I understand what you are saying in part Pam. But there is something fundamentally wrong with changing one’s skin color to achieve a standard of beauty. There is a message here. It is not about enhancement of what you are, it is about altering. Bottom line is, it is her choice and her body. But given the history of what color and skin tone has represented to people of color, I am seeing something far deeper happening here.


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